Articles
Dumping your Vendor
The best way to dump a vendor is to make it their fault.
First, invent a list of things that the software/product was never meant to do, and accuse your vendor of selling you a defective product because it can't do them. Refer to meetings (prefera...
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Chinese Zodiac
I am eating at my favourite Chinese restaurant, eating something I can never hope to pronounce properly nor do I particularly wish to identify all the ingredients, and I spy my placemat. It wasn’t a fancy or ornate placemat steeped in Oriental design...
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Porn
OK, porn. I've seen a few in my time. For this article, I'm going to stick with the kind of porn you could rent at BlockBusters, your ma & pa video store, or on the Spice/Vivid/Playboy/whatever channel because there's some crazy things out there and ...
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SPAM - Simplified
There are 187 e-mails in your Inbox
3 are from people you know
Hi, I'm Scott. I'm a middle-aged, white male with a penis that doesn't satisfy his woman, loves masturbating to dirty web-cam broadcasts as long as the performer's husband is away, an...
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Hello, I'm Your Account Representative
Good day everyone, I'd like to thank you all for taking time out of your busy schedules and hearing the exciting message I have for you all. You have questions about your enterprise computer solution; and I have the answers. Hello, I'm David Wilson, ...
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My Fasting Experience
A while ago I went on a fast, as dumb as that sounds. I had my reasons. I was taking Lipotor for a few months and it really kicked my ass; so, I stopped taking it. However, the pain didn't stop! I found out that Lipotor has the ability to enter the s...
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The Lottery Playas
There is a growing evil amongst us.
It can affect anyone, at any time, and without warning. It masquerades itself as benign, inconspicuous, and harmless. Chances are you have already witnessed it and not even taken notice.
I, like many people, ...
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Anti-Theft Security Devices
Independent studies show that shoplifting costs the American retail industry, and thereby the American public, $33.21 billion dollars per year, accounting for 1/3 of the total inventory shrinkage. Here is an inside, semi-indepth look at the devices w...
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The Finger
“I'm travelling down a stretch of road during rush-hour and a fellow motorist decides to make a two-lane change, without the use of his signal, and he gives me the finger!”
Sound familiar? It shouldn't, I was driving alone. However, I'm not stress...
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Acceptable Halloween Costumes
Halloween, the spookiest holiday of the year, celebrated by dressing up and knocking on strangers' doors for candy. The origin of Halloween is often credited to Samhain, a Celtic festival celebrating the end of the harvest season and the Celtic new y...
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All Hail The Fonz
Whether it’s the the cuffed jeans, the black leather jacket, the white t-shirt, the brill-creamed, duck-tailed pompadour, or the steely stare, nothing says late 70s like 50s throwback Arthur Herbert Fonzerelli, aka, The Fonz. Years have passed since ...
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